Coach Lynn's Parenting Tips

The Nutrient Rich Lifestyle!

2011-01-05T02:19:00.000-05:00

Recipe & Meal Ideas for a Nutrient-Rich Lifestyle
Eating well doesn't mean adding up lots of numbers to make sure you hit calorie and nutrient targets. Whether it's finding out how many daily calories are right for you, how much to eat from each food group, or figuring out how what you eat compares to recommendations, MyPyramid.gov has a tool for you.
For an in-depth assessment of your eating and physical activity habits, visit www.mypyramidtracker.gov.

Work at-home Tip!!!

2011-01-04T17:46:00.001-05:00

Many of our listeners are moms and dads who work at home. They may be consultants, realtors, editors.... Parents who work at-home often try to work while taking care of their young children. They find out very quickly just how utterly DIFFICULT and in some cases, how utterly frustrating it can be!

When my son was 1 1/2 years old, I tried to take on a part-time job that I could do from home. It entailed writing ---- on deadline! Should't be so hard right? WELL, the truth of the matter is, by the time I got him down for a nap (which was like trying to wrestle a riptide),
I was ready to collapse myself. Then, my mind would drift away to the mess the apartment was in, the dishes that were overflowing from the sink, laundry that was piling up, how tired I was... and then he would cry. Nap time was over, so he declared. In no time, my great ideas about "all the things I could get done," came to a screeching halt!

I had a guest on my show named Laura. Perhaps you can relate to her story. Laura is the mom of Chad, who is in kindergarten, and she also provides childcare for 3 children in her home. My telephone producer told me that Laura would like to be coached on learning that taking time for herself (i.e. working out, reading, going out with her girlfriends) is not selfish. This is a message that all moms need to hear: "Moms, taking time out for yourself regularly does
not TAKE ANYTHING AWAY from your kids, but actually helps you to be a better Mom, wife, and even business owner.

Answer these questions:
1) Do you ever yell at your children?
2) Did you think that you wouldn't?
3) Do you already see any special talents in any of your kids?
4) Did you have any really special dreams or talents as a child?
5) And, tell the truth... were they encouraged? How much?

It can be easy to forget this, but it is important that you remember that taking care of yourself now, is a direct result of what you were taight to think about yourself earlier in
life. If you were rewarded for being extra responsible, you are still dancing to that song
and being extra responsible with your family now. But, the only problem is, you are also very
human,and the human body wears out.... No one can be everything to everybody all of the time. It is a recipe for burn out, divorce, overeating, alcoholism, and nursing the secret thought
that no matter what you do, it never be good enough.

If Laura's story is all too familiar, here is homework for you:

PUT ON THE BREAKS FOR ONE WEEK. Take an inventory and look at what you do that is not completely necessary. You have nothing to prove. Get a teenager to help you out after school so you can get some time to work out, organize a mom's day out with your church lady friends and take turns caring for the children just for two hours. Chances are, when you take the time to step away, you will be refreshed and feel better about yourself and even be more effective when you come back. We want to know what you incorporate into your life so you are not just working it away. Write me back and let us all know! Prosper!

Consider this for a Xmas gift!!!

2010-12-17T22:17:00.012-05:00

Many of you are running about feverishly looking for that great gift for your child, friend's child, niece or nephew and even grandchild..... Yes, electronic toys are fun. Trains are great fro the holidays. Video games keep kids occupied for hours... BUT. when you give the love of learning, it stays with a child throughout their entire life.

I really love the company Homestart Learning Solutions for children from 3-7. It is an interactive web-based learning system that allows a parent to download up to 16 lessons that they can help their child master each month. I truly believe that we need to work with our young children to instill confidence in them, self esteem, and a love of learning. So, while you are circling the toys you will buy, and the toys, you will suggest to Santa Claus, bring home the learning with Homestart Learning. Two wonderful women and their wonderful son started the company. Combined, they have years and years of experience as teachers. Here is an excerpt from their monthly newsletter featured at http://homestartlearningsolutions.com/

Keeping Our Children Healthy and Happy

If you ask any parent what they wish for their child, you will invariably receive the same answers. “I want to raise a cheerful, confident and healthy child.” Many of us strive for this each and every day. Here are some tips to help.

1) Praise your child whenever you can. Too many times, children are told what they cannot do. We say, “Don’t jump on the couch!” “Don’t play ball in the house!”, Don’t push your baby sister!” the concentration is always on the negative. When trying to discipline your child, try not to use the word, “Don’t”. The next time your child keeps jumping on the couch, you might say: “You are growing so fast that you can jump high and far. When we go to the park later, let’s play a jumping game and see how far you can jump” And do go to the park and keep your word. Praise is much better. When your child helps you with a task like cleaning up his/her room, respond by saying how proud you are. You are my great helper. Always remember to state the action for the praise. Change the words you use for kids definitely like variety.

2) Too many play dates can cause problems. Of course, your child wants to visit a school friend and schedules must be planned in advance. You, too, have an agenda for your child. Perhaps you would like him/her to visit the library or take up playing an instrument. Homework time must also be considered. Interests can conflict and arguments can start. Parents need to beflexible. Children need down time where can be creative with their own toys. You cannot plan every waking moment in their lives.

3) Find time to spend as a family. Your child needs to learn to relax. You as a parent need to model this. If a child runs around too much this is not healthy. And if he sees you running from one activity to another, he soon learns this unhealthy behavior. Set time for homework and keep it reasonable. Then make family time for a game, or an important television program, or reading a good book together. Relaxation is vital for good health.

4) Children need physical activity. Our schools are not providing enough time for physical education. Most educational systems stress academics for most of the day. Your kids need a break after school so let them have time to unwind. You need to take them to a park and get involved in those climbing, running and sliding activities. Your child will feel good about himself and will remember that you took the time to play with him/her.

5) Listening –an overlooked skill. In our very busy world, both parents work and even if mom is at home, listening to a child often takes a backseat. You must listen to your child, contribute to the dialogues and praise and encourage. The smallest part of his day-whether he drew a circle face in art class, he helped a friend and the playground, received a smiley face on a test paper-are all very important moments in your child’s life. Stop, look and listen!! It will definitely help in raising a confident child.

6) Make Time Count. Reduce that morning “rush hour”.
a. A successful morning begins at night. Before your child goes to sleep, have him/her take out and order everything that will be needed for the next school day-homework in a folder, lunch money, notes for the teacher and of course what clothes will be worn for that day. Also, set out some easy to fix breakfast foods. Yogurt, dry cereals, peanut butter and jelly on bread/toast or even mention frozen mini waffles for a new idea.

b. Set the alarm clock 15 minutes earlier. This will make a big difference!

c. Set up a regular weekday bedtime depending on the age of your child. It is hard to concentrate the next day without a sufficient number of hours of sleep.

REMEMBER TO SAY “I LOVE YOU TO HELP THEM END THE DAY AND TO START A NEW ONE!

Holiday Recipe you can Make with Kids at Home!

2010-12-09T10:18:00.000-05:00

Kids are coming home for the holidays. Even with the jubilation from Christmas, at some point, they will appear, long-faced and bored. Can't you hear their desperate voice ringing in your ears right now? "Mom, I am bored!" Well, instead of waiting for this dreaded moment to occur, get your arsenal ready! I will supply you all holiday long with tis to delight and mostly keep occupied, your energy filled little elfs. Here is one of my favorites. Make a Towering Tree Cake with your kids!

Towering Tree Cake

Want your holiday dinner to end on a sweet note? Finish it off with this creative Christmas tree complete with candy ornaments, an icing garland, and (of course) presents!
Ingredients
1 (18.25-ounce) box yellow or white cake mix
Parchment paper or aluminum foil
12-inch wooden skewer
3 3/4 cups confectioners' sugar
4 1/2 tablespoons water
3 teaspoons vanilla, peppermint, or lemon extract
Food coloring in green and other shades of your choice
Candies for ornaments (we used Runts candies)
1 tube yellow decorators' icing (not gel icing)
Instructions
Prepare the cake mix according to the package directions using an electric mixer (this yields a firmer cake), then bake it in a 9- by 13-inch pan lined with parchment paper or foil. Let the cake cool completely.
Place the cake on a cutting board and use a long, sharp knife (parents only) to shave off the rounded top. Carefully flip over the cake and cut it into 7 squares, as shown, setting the extra aside. Cut the bottom half off each of the 2 smallest squares and set them aside withthe other leftover cake pieces.

Stack the cake squares from largest to smallest on a serving platter, setting each one at a 45-degree angle to the one below it. Trim the skewer so that it's just slightly shorter than the cake, then stick it down through the stack to help keep the squares together.
To prepare the glaze, stir together the confectioners' sugar, water, and extract in a medium bowl until smooth (it should be about the consistency of honey). Set aside 1/2 cup of the mixture, then tint the remaining glaze with the green food coloring until it reaches a shade you like. (We used about 1/8 teaspoon, or about 12 drops.)
Pour the tinted glaze over the cake from the top, using a rubber spatula or butter knife to gently spread it over the cake as needed.
To make the presents, divide the remaining icing among 2 or 3 bowls and tint each with a different shade of food coloring. Cut the extra cake pieces into small squares, then set them on a wire rack with a plate or waxed paper underneath. Pour the glaze over the squares. Let the icing set for a few minutes, then use a spatula to carefully move the presents to the base of the tree.
Decorate the tree with candy ornaments, then use the tube of decorators' icing to add a frosting garland to the tree and frosting ribbons and bows to the gifts. To serve, remove and cut the layers one at a time. Serves 18 to 20..

When to Keep your Child Home from School!

2010-10-14T11:25:00.000-04:00

Flu season is fast approaching. It becomes difficult to make a judgement call when you know that you have to get to work. After all, the company is downsizing, the mortgage or rent is due soon, and you don't want to join the scores of the underemployed or unemployed. However, keep in mind that even wheny our child doesn't feel well, there is an etiquette that most schools would like you to follow:
1) Don't send a child to school with a fever over 99.5 degrees
2) Please don't send your child to school if there is cloudy. murky, dripping slime coming from his or her nose
3) Don't send your child to school when they have the measles, mumps or head lice... (yes I am talking to you...)
4) Don't send your child to school with diarrhea and then be bothered when you are called in the middle of the day.
5) Don't send your child to school just because you don't want him or her at home!
And a wonderful child shared this poem with me during a "tell all" moment about how, sometimes, they just want to stay home. Either way, it's a judgement call. So use good judgement. Enjoy!

I don't want to go to school.l today,
Said little Peggy Ann McKay.
'I have the measles and the mumps,
A gash, a rash and purple bumps.
My mouth is wet, my throat is dry,
I'm going blind in my right eye.
My tonsils are as big as rocks,
I've counted sixteen chicken pox
And there's one more-that's seventeen,
And don't you think my face looks green?
My leg is cut-my eyes are blue-
It might be instamatic flu.
I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke,
I'm sure that my left leg is broke-
My hip hurts when I move my chin,
My belly button's caving in,
My back is wrenched, my ankle's sprained,
My 'pendix pains each time it rains.
My nose is cold, my toes are numb.
I have a sliver in my thumb.
My neck is stiff, my voice is weak,
I hardly whisper when I speak.
My tongue is filling up my mouth,
I think my hair is falling out.
My elbow's bent, my spine ain't straight,
My temperature is one-o-eight.
My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear,
There is a hole inside my ear.
I have a hangnail, and my heart is-what?
What's that? What's that you say?
You say today is...Saturday?
G'bye, I'm going out to play! '

Do You Need a Baby Planner?

2010-09-29T15:06:00.000-04:00

Do you Need a Baby Planner?

Whether you are having a baby or adopting a baby, it can be labor intensive. There are so many things to consider: how to select a pediatrician, what the best products are to buy, what your baby will need, when and how to plan a baby shower, where to add your name and select items for a baby registry, and it goes on and on....

When your baby is born, you will promptly need more resources, and definitely more help. And somewhere along the way, your tired eyes just may meet your partner's eye and you'll somehow muster energy for love and excitement about realizing a shared dream: starting your own family!

The days of having to do everything yourself, are over! Relinquish some of the control over "managing the baby needs" so you can be in this very special moment in time of "bonding with your baby." Hire baby planners. They are all over the world so the chance that they are close to you is greater than you think. Let them research and outsource some of your baby work. Let's face it. Most of us have so little time these days that we rarely get to just stop to smell the roses and so our homelike starts to look more like "the war of the Roses."

Baby planners are everywhere around the globe! A quick search in google will tell you where to find one in your area.

When a baby is born, the world stops for a moment to sigh. A new life begins and a new chance to realize the wonder and miracle of life. Allow yourself the time and energy that raising a family deserves and leave many of the little troublesome details to someone else. You can plan to do that. Now there is a great plan you can live with!

How to Deal with LIFE Challenges

2010-09-20T20:22:00.002-04:00

One thing is for sure! You "live" your whole life long. But how you live is entirely up to you. Many people don’t see it that way. But do you? Do you realize that you keep communicating and developing throughout your lifetime? Well today, I will look deeper into the philosophy of live, love, laugh and see how three simple words can change your life! How do you incorporate each of these things in your life and which area is lacking most?

What life issue do you find yourself bumping up against the most? In a survey, the top five issues that people said they are dealing with the most were:

1) Money 2) Jobs 3) Relationships 4) Parenting issues And 5) Health Some others were the end of the world, and what people think of you.

HERE ARE:

The Top 5 Ways To Appreciate Your Life EVEN WITH ITS CHALLENGES!

1. FOCUS on the idea that things can always get better – You may be having a rough time in your life right now, but you need to sit down and think about the fact that you’ve had many other amazing times in your life.

2. Get a pet or play with a puppy. Pets give love unconditionally. Puppies are full of life and wonder. They will literally make you laugh just watching them! When you are down, they will literally cheer you up and love you through anything. Having a pet can get you through some very rough times because no matter what, they’re always there for you. Dogs are called “a mans best friend” for a reason. Having a pet is like having a permanent emotional support system on call.

3. Watch or play with a baby – When you look at a baby, especially one that’s laughing or smiling, you can’t help but feel happy. The innocence of a baby, their energy and vibrance can fill an entire room. Babies represent hope and you can attach to hope always.

4. Appreciate your life MORE. - Even though you don’t have everything you need and things have happened that make you unhappy, appreciate the things you do have. Don’t dwell on the negative things, give gratitude for the simple things.

5. Volunteer to help someone less fortunate. - Nothing puts things in perspective more like taking a walk with the guy who has no shoes. Like that old adage says, I used to think my shoes were old and dirty, uncomfortable and too small until I talked to the guy who had no shoes. Put yourself to work helping someone who is less fortunate than you so that you can recognize that no matter how terrible things are today, someone, somewhere is worse off. If you use what you do have to help them, you will feel more fulfilled.

WANT TO CONQUER THESE FEELINGS?

Here is your homework: For the next five days, utilize each of the top five strategies. Then, incorporate them into every day for a month. What you will find is that at the end of that month, your life would have already changed for the better … and guess what? You’ll appreciate it!

My thoughts about HomeStart Learning Solutions

2010-09-09T12:14:00.000-04:00

School is back in session all over the world for our kids, but it's also in session for you! Here are some "Coach Lynn's training tips for parents" that may help you survive your kids in school. When your young child starts school, you shouldn't just think about their homework and their play dates or social interactions. Think about whether your little brainiac will truly be adequately prepared for a life of learning. Pay attention there will be a test afterwards!!!!

On my last show, I spoke with Marilyn Kravitz, the Program Curriculum Director for one of our new sponsors- HomeStart Learning Solutions. It is a wonderful concept. Marilyn and her sister Estelle started HomeStart. Both women worked as teachers in the New York Public School system cumulatively for over 60 plus years. Their nephew saw all of the wonderful curriculum they had developed and urged them to start the company. Specifically, the HomeStart program allows a parent every month to download curriculum that is appropriate for 4-7 year olds and work on it with their child. (I find you have to supplement your child's learning experience at home all the way up to college).

There are so many reasons why you should supplement your child's learning experience, especially in their formative years. You can do this by introducing them to cultural events and activities, supporting hands-on learning like puzzles, recipes and cooking, and for those who really love a challenge - the Rubik's cube! In the event that parents are too busy to try to keep up with their child every step of the way, this program has these extra added benefits:

* The two women who developed HomeStart and the curriculum, have cumulatively 60 plus years of teaching 4-7 year olds.
* The program works by subscription (3 month, 6 month and annual) and is affordable.
* It "tracks" the academic year, tracks the curriculum, and provides classroom-tested and "fun-to-do" activities.
* There is a monthly parent guide, that even gives instruction to the parent on HOW to use it and work with your child!

At the risk of seeming like a commercial, I just want to emphasize that I believe that parents should take an active role in their child's education. Studies prove that children who work along with their parents on child-centered educational activities from age 2 are better prepared for a successful school experience.
There is nothing available on the web geared towards parents taking an active role in their kids education from 4-7. You can go to bookstores and find workbooks, computer software and complete homeschool curriculum. But this program can be utilized to ACCENTUATE any school your child may be enrolled in. The educators who developed this unique program wanted something for parents who felt hopeless or helpless to help them accelerate the learning process. HomeStart is different from so many other programs because it covers the basics with 16 downloadable activities you can do with your child during the month. You can choose any or all of the 16. I wish someone would develop a program for mom's of high school teenagers that teaches text language, social nuances and how to do CHEMISTRY PROBLEMS ---- again!

My hats, yes I said hats, salute Marilyn Kravetz and Estelle Feldman for starting HomeStart Learning Solutions. I think we should send it as a gift to every 4-7 year old we know. They have developed curriculum for children for decades. Even though the curriculum is for kids to work at home, it is important that parents be interactive in being a part of their child's educational experience!

The Coach Lynn Radio Show

2010-08-31T03:51:00.000-04:00

PLEASE TUNE IN LIVE on Tuesdays at 11:00am EST. Coach Lynn's Radio Show is aired in over 100 countries. You may participate via twitter at Coach Lynn Show or LIVE in our online chat rooom during the "behind the scenes" broadcasts on Tuesdays at 11:00 am EST at http://asklynnjohnson.com or http://coachlynnshow.com. DO YOU WANT TO COACHED ONTHE AIR? Call us at 866-858-9428.

TANTRUM CENTRAL

2010-08-25T15:04:00.000-04:00

Dear Coach Lynn,

My three year old goes from one tantrum to the next! I would put her in preschool but I am afraid that they will kick her out because she throws humdinger tantrums. I work at home all day with no help to take care of Ellie. My job is fairly stressful and I am always on deadline from one week to the next. The tantrums go on for long periods of time and are fairly dramatic. I just don’t know what to do. I try to work but sometimes she makes it mostly impossible. Callie, mom of tantrum Ellie.

Callie, tantrums can be extremely difficult to get through, but let’s remember why children age 3 throw them. One reason is that they don’t have the words to explain that they feel upset or restless, even bored. Another reason is that they feel they are not being treated fairly. They get a real sense of fairness around this age as you see them tell when another child has been on the swing too long when they become anxious and upset. Also, kids throw tantrums to gain attention from their parents. Perhaps, Ellie feels your sense of frustration from trying to work at home during the day while she is there.

Callie, it is important to understand what is common in the development of a three year old. Perhaps this will also help you key in on what Ellie’s behavior is telling you:

Ages 2-3

Physical and Language: Motor Ability: jumps off a step, rides a tricycle, uses crayons, builds a 9-10 cube tower.
Language: starts to use short sentences controls and explores world with language, stuttering may appear briefly. Fear of separation.

Emotional: Negativistic (2 ½ yrs), Violent emotions, anger
Differentiates facial expressions of anger, sorrow, and joy. Sense of humor (Plays tricks)

Social: Talks, uses "I" "me" "you". Copies parents' actions. Dependent, clinging, possessive about toys, enjoys playing alongside another child. Negativism (2 ½ yrs).
Resists parental demands

As you can see, Age three is a magical year where your child is trying to develop a sense of personhood but is still anxious about separating from you. So, if you are working all day and Ellie is not benefiting from your attention, she will get upset …. Very upset.

Perhaps, it is time for Ellie to make her way towards school or scheduled activities. My sense is that it will make life easier for both of you! Thanks and good luck… this too, shall pass.

Prosper!
Coach Lynn

How Can you Establish Balance Between Your Kids and Your Job?

2010-08-25T14:12:00.000-04:00

Does your day start before you even peel yourself out of bed? Do you feel like you are running on empty every night? Do you fall asleep before your head even h its the pillow? How can you balance kids and parenting even though this recession is asking people to do more work for the same pay?

It is important to keep your job in a time when even some of the strongest companies are teetering on bankruptcy. The job market is as small as Honey I Shrunk The Kids. However, parenting is the most important job you will ever have. It is vitally important for your kids to see you manage your life and balance it. It is important for your kids to see that even though life has challenges, you tackle them by finding solutions. Here are 3 crucial solutions:

Set Ground Rules at home and at the office. Talk with your boss and explain that you are willing to work evenings, weekends, in exchange for scheduling presets with your family. Sit down and talk with your family and give them a realistic picture of your job and the idea that sometimes you will need to work extra hours.

Learn to Delegate. You cannot do it all, no matter how much you want to. There are things that family members can do at home that will make a big difference for you. the family can help with chores. Children who do chores learn responsibility and also get a great lesson in learning how to be grateful.

Know When to Go for Outside Help. Set yourself free from feeling that getting outside help is a poor reflection on you. There are many nontraditional ways to get extra support without breaking your budget. There are teen mother's helpers. There are laundry services. You can pick and choose which essential clothes need to be professionally laundered and save the cost of dry cleaning, some even wash and dry by the pound and at bulk is pretty inexpensive.

Make family time a priority no matter how little time you have. When your family feels important, they are more cooperative, organized and peaceful. When your family feels neglected, ignored and stressed, it makes for a stressful life. When you set specific times of fun only with family, it gives everyone a time to look forward to and eases tensions in between those times.

Prosper!
Coach Lynn

A LETTER FROM CINDY, A LISTENER

2010-08-25T14:01:00.000-04:00

Dear Coach Lynn,

I believe that my baby daughter, age 2, may have Autism but I am not sure. The thing is, I have always heard that if she does have Autism, she will never learn and neverhave a real chance for having a good life. It makes me so sad and I don't know what to do. Please help. I love your show. Cindy

Cindy, thank you for sending me your letter about your daughter. I understand that you are afraid to think that she may have Autism. however, you will not be in any position ot help her if you don't move beyond being paralyzed. Let your love for your daughter guide your steps.

Recently, we did a show on Autism. Many parents wanted to know what signs to look for in their children. In recent years, over a million children were born with Autism Spectrum Disorder. Some argue the causes are vaccinations and even perhaps our food supply but the cause is unknown. Still there are fascinating aspects of the Autistic mind. How can an autistic child who won't talk to you solve complex mathematical equations? ASD varies widely in severity and symptoms and may go unrecognized, especially in mildly affected children or when it is masked by more debilitating handicaps. Very early indicators that require evaluation by an expert include:

no babbling or pointing by age 1: *no single words by 16 months or two-word phrases by age 2: *no response to name *loss of language or social skills *poor eye contact
excessive lining up of toys or objects: *no smiling or social responsiveness *impaired ability to make friends with peers *impaired ability to initiate or sustain a conversation with others *absence or impairment of imaginative and social play
stereotyped, repetitive, or unusual use of language *restricted patterns of interest that are abnormal in intensity or focus *preoccupation with certain objects or subjects *inflexible adherence to specific routines or rituals.

When a parent receives the news that their baby is Autistic, what is the first thing they should do? NOT GIVE UP. Despite what some common misconceptions are Cindy, your child can learn and can live a happy life. It will be up to you, however, to get him or her tested to see where they are on the spectrum of Autism. Then, work along with the professionals to find a supportive learning environment for your child. Do your research and learn as much as you can. And be ready to question, challenge and stand up for the right of your child to be treated with dignity.

Our children are by far our best assets-All of our children. And whether that child is autistic, short, tall, creative, athletic, or whatever...what's most important is that he or she gets the message that noone gets to decide whether they are good enough or not. Most importantly, advocate for your child. Don't worry about whether people will like you or not. Your child's safety, health and welfare are worth more than your worry over someone else's approval. Give your child th is vital message:

You are beautiful and wonder just because you are!

Prosper!
Coach Lynn